Three quick questions: Are you a college student, do have a backside and do you want $500? If you answered yes to all three, then KFC wants to hear from you.

Sales must be slowing for KFC’s heart-clogging monstrosity, the Double Down sandwich, because the company just launched a desperate-sounding an inventive new marketing campaign. Yes, the Colonel’s looking for college co-ed’s to serve as human billboards by wearing branded sweatpants. Students interested in becoming a ‘brand ambASSador’ are invited to apply via KFC’s Facebook page, and will receive a cool $500 for their troubles. Oh, and sorry dudes, it’s ladies only.

One more thing, one of our fearless ASU interns has applied and we’ll keep you posted on her progress. And considering our pay rate, she could really use the cheddar.